Surrender

For as long as I can remember my main goals have been to please God and for my family to be proud of me...and to be a millionaire but that's not what we're focusing on in this post.

I now realize that there is no pleasing God without constantly seeking Him for daily understanding of what He requires of you...and wanting my family to be proud of me was more self-pride than an actual goal. It was the praise of those I love that motivated me to accomplish things. With each milestone, there was a "Go, Renee" that I fed off of. But, obeying God, despite how it's perceived by family and friends has become much more purposeful.

One thing my pastor, Dr. Dharius Daniels often refers to are the three ways that we can go about what we do:

I. Culture's Way

II. Church's Way

III. God's (the Kingdom) Way

Culture's way is to do what you feel; whatever satisfies you in the moment, do that. Church's way says to follow a set of rules that make you look like you are in God's will; to fake it until you make it. God's way is to follow His instruction in every unique moment and circumstance; no two instances are exactly the same, so seek Him on maneuvering the task before you.

I've often been mocked for my faith; mostly in jest, I believe. But the sensitivity in me has allowed me to experience offense from the jabs against my commitment to God. Laughs or jokes about being churchy or Jesus-y left me feeling hurt and isolated. When you care about something or someone deeply and it's poked fun at, it can make you feel a way.

I realize it's a small cross to bear when you consider the persecution of Paul or many other believers who were imprisoned, battered and beaten for their faith. I've got it easy when you consider what even modern day Christians experience in some countries.

I also understand that my lifestyle may not be of the model Christian. There are standards that Christians are expected to live by that I do not. But, God has assured me that I am right where I am supposed to be.

When you think of how God showed love for prostitutes, murderers, thieves, adulterers, and more, it becomes clear that He is the God of grace. He shows us mercy where humans point judgment.

God is able to use every and anyone to share his goodness. He used a liar, a cheater, and a former persecutor of believers. I'm not perfect but I love God with all of me. He is at the center of every decision I make and He leads me in all that I do.

He often leads me to do things that aren't humanly rational, but after tugging and pulling, I surrender; maybe not fully. I often want to back track and revert to what my flesh wants. But my heart strings won't let me stay in disobedience for long. God has a way of redirecting me to Him.

If you find yourself battling with what the world thinks vs. what you know God is saying, follow His voice. The outcome far outweighs the temporary pleasures of obtaining that thing you think you want. That thing will come into your life and not even be what it was cracked up to be.

On the other side of the discomfort of obedience is a sense of peace that only He can provide and is far greater than your sacrifice. In surrender to God, you will slowly but surely embrace a new, better version of yourself; one that doesn't care about what people think but is committed to making the choice God leads you to. And then you'll discover over and over again that His way is the best way.