Thirty-Ate and Left No Crumbs: What I’ve Learned in my 30's So Far

Another 365, and here I am feeling the fullness of every lesson these thirty-ate years have fed me. I won’t lie to you, this decade has been a whole entree. Some bites were sweet, others tough to chew, but every single one has nourished the woman I’ve become. So as I reflect on this year, I’m sharing eight lessons I’ve learned—not just for me, but maybe for you too, wherever you are on your journey.

1. Speak in Truth.

Whether it’s advocating for yourself, your needs, or standing in the gap for someone else, your authentic voice matters. Don't just say what you think people want to hear. Say what needs to be said. Say it with grace, and if God has led you to speak, He will give you the words.

2. Serve First.

Self-care is vital, yes. Bubble baths, therapy, and boundaries are the vibe. But so is caring for others—especially when God’s given you something they need. Don’t withhold your light just because you don't feel like showing up. Refill, then pour. Someone’s healing might be tucked in your “yes.”

3. Pay Attention to Your Patterns.

Inconsistencies don’t lie. Growth is in the areas you’re avoiding. The procrastination, the excuses, the loops—you gotta face those things. You can’t keep praying for change but refusing to participate in your own transformation. Rest is vital. And, so is work.

4. Stop Entertaining Situationships.

Listen, ya'll, if it drains you, confuses you, or keeps you in cycles of heartbreak—it’s not for you. Period. You’re not desperate, you’re discerning now. Unfulfilling relationships will only delay what is divine. This goes for my queens and my kings.

5. Hurt People… Just Hurt People.

People don’t always mean to wound you. Their actions may trigger your insecurities, but it’s not always malicious. Sometimes, they’re just broken. And honestly? So are you in places. Extend grace, but also take note of what still needs healing in you.

6. Culture Can Keep That. I Want Purpose.

I wasn’t made to fit into trends or timelines. I was made to fit into purpose. And the only way I can keep discovering what that is, is by seeking God daily—through prayer, worship, silence, good company, and sacred spaces. I set the atmosphere, and He shows up.

7. Do It Anyway.

No, I don’t always feel like it. Cleaning, meal prepping, working out, reading Scripture. But you know what? Discipline breeds results. Obedience over mood. Always.

8. Be Confident in the Original God Made.

I’m not a copy. Neither are you. And the more I lean into my authenticity, the more aligned I feel. God didn’t miss a beat when He made me. I am authentically, divinely, and correctly created.

BONUS LESSON:

9. Navigate the pivot.

You know what they say, "If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans." While it's important to strategize and set goals, I can almost guarantee you that your goals will get shaken up at some point. Write the vision, make it plain, but don't be married to it. Be willing to step into God's flow as He redirects you.

Write the vision, make it plain, but don't be married to it.

So what’s next? I don't know, and that's okay. I’ve got two more years of these thirties, and I’m making them GR8T. I hope to keep growing, glowing, learning, and loving loudly—with no crumbs left behind.

Cheers to 38. Let’s eat.